©June 2011 by Fabienne Lopez
A friend contacted me not long ago complaining, “There are no good men!” Her exclamation had me thinking about the bad habits and negative mindsets we develop when we want to find Mr. or Mrs. Right; our sins to speak of. They often act as stumbling blocks and prevent us from finding love.
I thought a humorous perspective at the seven ways we subvert our chances of happiness would be a nice complement to my previous series on “How to Seduce the….man”. Voila! A new set of posts is born.
Each sabotaging behavior can be associated with a sin, which astrology correlates with a planet and a sign. Below, a refresher course of the 7 sins and their astrological equivalency:
1. Pride (Sun & Leo): You’re too good for him
2. Sloth (Moon & Cancer): You don’t actively date
3. Wrath (Mars & Aries): You have past relationships anger issues
4. Envy (Mercury, Gemini & Virgo): You expect perfection
5. Lust (Venus, Taurus & Libra): You seek intimacy without emotion
6. Gluttony (Jupiter & Sagittarius): You exude neediness
7. Greed (Saturn & Capricorn): You aim for material security instead of love
Let’s start with the first sin. Pride is ruled by the Sun who symbolizes the Self, our identity, self-expression, worth, and confidence. In excess, our natural self-esteem becomes Vanity, the boastful belief in our own abilities, a super-confidence in ourselves that ignores our shortcomings, imperfections, and failings. Not merely proud or pleased with who we are, but inordinately so.
In the dating scene, this high opinion of your merit incites you to believe you are better than everyone else, and “above the rules”. As a consequence, you stop going out. Pride let’s you think you cannot find someone worthy.
If you consider yourself immune from this sin, ponder the last time when you hesitated to go out on a date with somebody because you thought he was not good enough for you. He was the wrong age group, not attractive, or lacked financial stability.
The Leo Vanity
This is the negative side of Leo talking; the one who considers no other person is equal to them, and therefore deserving of their time and admiration.
Underneath this attitude lurks a fear of being ordinary, a convoluted belief of unworthiness, and a conviction of not meriting to be treated like a Queen – with respect, courtesy, and a sense of awe for our individuality and uniqueness. Pride is often a compensatory attitude for this lack of faith in who we are.
Making dating enjoyable
To multiply the chances of finding a partner, play the number game. Adopt Leo’s motto “I love to have fun and I want to share a good time.” Go outside your normal standards, enjoy yourself, and, don’t expect to lead to anything; view, instead, the person as a possible new friend.
Realize not every lad you meet will be a match. Dating should be a pleasant activity, a personal growth experience where you learn to discern which traits in a lover make you happy.
I’d love if you take a moment to add this to Stumble, Digg, or Delicious because that will help me get more readers. Thank you!
Photos Credits: Flickr Creative Commons